From fad diets to midwives cures, food has long been a source of high hopes and false promises for those of us seeking a natural way to heal, stay healthy, and get skinny. I like to consider myself a smart, saavy, sophisticated woman, unswayed by absurd quackery. And yet, over the years, thereve been more than a few absurd food experiments that have been too promising to not try. So did the big promises pay off? Click on through to see!
Of course, the way we eat, the things we put into our body, and the food choices we make are a vital part of our health and none of these ridiculous food experiments or any others should ever be taken lightly. Always consult with your licensed medical provider before trying anything out of the ordinary with your food and diet.
Bananas for MigrainesWhen Dear Abby published a "surefire" cure for migraines which included placing a ripe banana peel on your forehead, I insisted my husband try it the next time a migraine hit. He laid on the bed in a dark room, I gently pressed the sticky side of a banana to his noggin, and nothing happened. Years later, I discovered the "cure" was actually an ineffective old wives tale. Surprise, surprise.
The Master CleanseTen days. Nearly a hundred glasses of cayenne pepper and maple syrup spiked lemonade. I lost 14 pounds, and gained the unsavory superpower of smelling people's breath from three feet away. Which, as one might guess, isn't a very sexy superpower after all.
The Cabbage Soup DietCabbage soup and nothing but cabbage soup for days on end? I made it two days before my tastebuds begged for flavor in any way shape or form. Frosted sugar cookies, as it turns out, make a beautiful dessert to a two-day cabbage soup diet.
Vitamin C CureAn ABC newsanchor once promised me the ultimate cure-all for any cold. She had developed it over the years, she claimed, because if she lost her voice, she was unable to go on air. Thus, she needed a serious fix for those seasonal sniffles. Her secret: consuming nearly 20,000iu's of Vitamin C in the first 48 hours to burn out the virus (and everything else in your system). Yikes!
Raw Protein PowderWith high hopes for pursuing a raw vegan diet, I purchased a giant tub of Raw Protein, only to blend it into a fruit smoothie that was more inedible than a pouch of radioactive mud. 'Nuff said.
Plastic Body WrapsYep. Soaked hot towels in chamomile tea, then wrapped my nekkid body like a plasticked up mummy. The result? I lost two inches, for about two days. Which was long enough to compete in the Miss Roy Utah contest way back when, and lose less-than-graciously to a red-headed minx from the small town next to mine. C'est la vie, eh?
Garlic for AnthraxAfter 9/11, when anthrax scares hit the postal service, my hypochondria kicked up a notch and I felt certain a stay-at-home mom of four in suburbia should definitely take precautions. A quick web search offered up anti-anthrax promises, so I started consuming garlic pills. All these years later, I'm still anthrax-free. Perhaps that old wives tale had something to it? (Note: prolly not!)
Snackwell's Diet SnacksThey say most college students will put on a "Freshman 15" but I was determined to steer clear of weight gain, so I consumed ungodly amounts of Snackwell's Devil's Food cookies to stay skinny. Ten pounds later, the joke was on me. Who'dve thunk the science of a fat-free diet would fail us sugar-bingers so miserably?
Epic RamenA high school friend insisted that Top Ramen was fat free, as long as you didn't use the packet of seasoning. So we'd meet everyday afterschool, cook up the noodles, then flavor them with soy sauce, lemon pepper, and grated cheese. Good holy heavens, why didn't someone stop us?!
Wheatgrass ClenaseEarly last year, I have this brilliant idea to start every morning with wheatgrass shots, since there are a few online forums that sing the simple green juice some serious praises. Only problem? Wheatgrass consumption can come with a bellyache. And two days of diarrhea. Was that an overshare?
Now its your turn! What are the zaniest food experiments youve tried? Howd they turn out? Leave us a comment and share your story!
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